Matan David's Birth Story

Matan David was born on June 21, 2011.

He has been a great baby so far...granted, there is a plethora of diaper changes and nonstop feeding...but that's to be expected! Sivan is doing a great job as a big sister, although we're not entirely confident she isn't going to literally smother him with love if we don't supervise.

As far as my birth story...

Sivan's birth was traumatic for me--my water broke before I ever felt a contraction. We ended up with an induction, epidural that didn't work, another epidural, 3.5 hours of pushing, and ultimately an emergency C-section. I knew I really didn't want another c-section, but had doctors giving me odds between 50-90% (depending on the doctor) that I would have to have another one because I was "too small". Adam supported my decision to try for a vaginal birth (vbac) despite the odds, and we found the perfect doctor, who was encouraging although realistic and was a great match for me. We also found a great doula who really believed I could have a vbac despite what most doctors told me. I was extremely nervous about the labor/delivery...I had trouble figuring out what mindset to have--on the one hand, I didn't want to be shocked if I ended up with a csection, on the other hand, I knew that there is a mental component to laboring, and that I had to "believe" I could have a vbac.

2 weeks before Matan was born, we found out the baby was 7 pounds (turned out this was wrong) but I got really scared about how it was all going to work. Then the other doctor in the practice saw me and also was very negative about my chances. When I told my regular doctor, he told me I was small but that he thought I could do it and I had to be tough.

On Friday morning, I woke up with period-like cramps and backaches and a not great night of sleep and realized that this was the beginning of labor. It went on and off most of the day, and I figured we'd have a shabbat baby. Nope--by Friday night, I just had to go to bed. I didn't sleep well that night and Saturday had contractions again on and off all day. Saturday night, same thing...Sunday morning, same thing, but we decided to go strawberry picking anyway. They still weren't strong enough to do anything. By Monday morning at 4 am, they were much stronger, and I got scared. I called my doula, and by 7:30 am she was at my house. I was feeling it in my back and front but they were 5-10 minutes apart. Interestingly, when Sivan was up and getting ready for camp, my contractions slowed and weakened considerably. Before 11 am, my doula left because nothing was progressing. She told us to try to take a nap. I did and woke up with contractions that were much worse again. They started nearing 5 minutes apart, and we again called our doula. She came back that afternoon. But again, when Sivan was around, things would slow/stop. And so my doula and Adam were frustrating things weren't progressing. By 7 pm, I was exhausted and begging to go to the hospital to just get an epidural and get some sleep. Adam and the doula kept reminding me this would not be good. And the doctor told me if I came in, I'd probably end up with a csection. I was frustrated with his insensitivity, but looking back, I think he said that because he was really trying to help me. We went on a walk around the block. And by 9 pm, we decided to try to give me some benadryl and see if I could sleep a little because it seemed my body was too tired to get the contractions under 5 minutes apart. I slept for about 20 minutes and things were picking up again. Adam stayed asleep longer while my doula labored with me for 2 hours. We tried some herbal remedies to pick things up. They seemed to be picking up again. The contractions were strong, but the problem was they weren't "close enough". Finally by midnight, I had another "please just let me go to the hospital" moment and so we woke up Adam. Adam and my doula again tried talking me out of it...and I told them to give me a deadline. We agreed on "12 contractions". After each one, I counted "that was one". "that was two"....etc. By 2:30 am, we were done with the 12, and I told them I could not go any longer without some sleep. We finally called the doctor and he said, it sounds like you're suffering, come in. Adam and the doula managed to stall for another hour until we packed everything...it was about 3:30 am when we left. The ride to the hospital was 30 minutes and I had a contraction every 8 minutes. Contractions in a car are not fun! When we got to the hospital, I was 4 cm and 100% effaced. The doctor recommended I get an epidural to get some sleep. It seemed to me my body needed some rest too, and I agreed despite my initial thoughts on it. But at this point, I had been having strong contractions for 24 hours and was so exhausted. Until we got it, it was another hour or so, which was great, because it allowed things to really progress. We asked for a light epidural so he gave me a half dose which allowed me to still feel some things without much pain. I got to 8 cm within an hour or so after that and then the doctor broke my water. I was ready to push soon after. I had a really bad nerve pain in one of my legs, and so I looked forward to pushing because when I was focused on that, I didn't notice the pain as much. While I was pushing, Adam and I were skeptical about whether it was going to work. At one point, the nurse said "we're not having a csection today". Adam later said he was angry someone was getting my hopes up. Then my doula said it, and I said "why are you saying that? you said you'd wait until the baby crowned". Then the doctor said "i'm too tired to do surgery today!" From my perspective and Adam's, we were no farther along than we had been with Sivan and so we were literally confused when the doctor started putting on scrubs and tools started appearing. When the baby's head emerged, both Adam and I were stunned! It worked! It was really great, and I'm so glad I gave it a go. They immediately put the baby on my chest and I nursed him before the placenta even came out! Sivan visited with grandma less than four hours later. She loved him instantaneously and got over him not being a girl immediately. It was sooo much of a better experience than what happened with Sivan. It's nice not to have my abdomen cut up and be able to hold both my children on my lap. I still have a different recovery now, but it's much easier.